Wait for Me!
by Deborah Mitford
My rating 5 out of 5 stars
For Mitford sisters fans, Deborah is essential reading. The youngest, she achieved the highest rank, as Duchess of Devonshire. She was too young to know the earlier Mitford households, Batsford House then Asthall Manor, which were mythologised as 'Alconleigh' by sister Nancy in the bestselling semi-autobiographical novel The Pursuit of Love.
Instead, Deborah grew up at Swinbrook, which their father built and the older Mitford girls despised due to its lack of historic charm or communal library (which had been most of their autodidactic bedrock).In some ways therefore a standalone, Deborah lacked her siblings' unfulfilled yearnings for formal education, instead relishing her rural childhood and many animals. She loved horse riding and many of her father's country interests, which the others (except for 2nd eldest Pam) longed to escape.
Perhaps because of these adored formative years, she was arguably the most well adjusted Mitford girl and was noted for always treating people of every social strata equally.
When She married Lord Andrew Cavendish, younger son of the 10th Duke of Devonshire, in 1941, there was no thought of him inheriting the dukedom, the couple living in various bucolic settings on the fringes of her in-laws' estates. She otherwise went around England with her army husband, whose military pay was pretty ordinary.
Only when Andrew's older brother William, Marquess of Hartington, was killed in action in 1944 did he unexpectedly become heir. When Andrew became the 11th Duke of Devonshire on his father death in 1950, Deborah was a Duchess!
Post-war inheritance taxes of 80% approx. (a bill of £7 million or £220 million in 2016) meant selling off much of the vast Dukedom of Devonshire estate to pay for retaining the jewel in its crown, historic Chatsworth House.
As the new Duchess, Deborah faced the mammoth task of resorting Chatsworth, for centuries the Cavendish family seat, which would open to the public to pay for its upkeep. From scratch she learned to restore and maintain one of Britain's foremost stately homes, becoming the face of Chatsworth for decades, at times manning Chatsworth's ticket office herself.
These projects later extended to other heritage listed sites in the estate. In those restorative arts, and in running a stately home, she became an expert, writing around a dozen books on Chatsworth itself, plus numerous works of personal memoir. In 1999, she was appointed a Dame Commander of the Royal Victorian Order (DCVO) by Queen Elizabeth II, for her service to the Royal Collection Trust.
She became Dowager Duchess on her husband's death in 2004 and died herself in 2014 aged 94, the last surviving Mitford sister.
Her memoir Wait for me! takes its title from her being the youngest and therefore the last in early family outings and activities, always running behind trying to catch up on her tiny young legs. Her teasing eldest sister Nancy always said down to earth Deborah had retained the mental age of an eight or nine year old, never acquiring the airs and graces expected of a grand duchess. Of course, this was Nancy's way with all.
Deborah (nicknamed 'Debo' from an early age) entertained and befriended everyone of world importance, from the Kennedys in the 50s and 60s to Prince Charles and Camilla in the new millennium, yet always had some small anecdote about even the humblest servant.
This striking humility, with her gratitude for the good fortune she enjoyed (and quiet stoicism over the losses of three of her seven babies), makes her writing immediate and engaging. Like most of her famous sisters, she had a natural talent for writing and storytelling and was a true eccentric, at strokes fascinating, moving and hilarious.
Not the fanciest Mitford sister, the wittiest or the archest, Debo is the most solid and grounded of those published. Her photographs from over the decades, from angelic infancy, to tulle and diamante bedecked debutante, to hostess of twentieth century world leaders, are breathtaking.
Of all Debo's books, this one in particular is the icing on the cake for any Mitford canon devotee. She does not disappoint!
Perhaps because of these adored formative years, she was arguably the most well adjusted Mitford girl and was noted for always treating people of every social strata equally.
When She married Lord Andrew Cavendish, younger son of the 10th Duke of Devonshire, in 1941, there was no thought of him inheriting the dukedom, the couple living in various bucolic settings on the fringes of her in-laws' estates. She otherwise went around England with her army husband, whose military pay was pretty ordinary.
Only when Andrew's older brother William, Marquess of Hartington, was killed in action in 1944 did he unexpectedly become heir. When Andrew became the 11th Duke of Devonshire on his father death in 1950, Deborah was a Duchess!
Post-war inheritance taxes of 80% approx. (a bill of £7 million or £220 million in 2016) meant selling off much of the vast Dukedom of Devonshire estate to pay for retaining the jewel in its crown, historic Chatsworth House.
As the new Duchess, Deborah faced the mammoth task of resorting Chatsworth, for centuries the Cavendish family seat, which would open to the public to pay for its upkeep. From scratch she learned to restore and maintain one of Britain's foremost stately homes, becoming the face of Chatsworth for decades, at times manning Chatsworth's ticket office herself.
These projects later extended to other heritage listed sites in the estate. In those restorative arts, and in running a stately home, she became an expert, writing around a dozen books on Chatsworth itself, plus numerous works of personal memoir. In 1999, she was appointed a Dame Commander of the Royal Victorian Order (DCVO) by Queen Elizabeth II, for her service to the Royal Collection Trust.
She became Dowager Duchess on her husband's death in 2004 and died herself in 2014 aged 94, the last surviving Mitford sister.
Her memoir Wait for me! takes its title from her being the youngest and therefore the last in early family outings and activities, always running behind trying to catch up on her tiny young legs. Her teasing eldest sister Nancy always said down to earth Deborah had retained the mental age of an eight or nine year old, never acquiring the airs and graces expected of a grand duchess. Of course, this was Nancy's way with all.
Deborah (nicknamed 'Debo' from an early age) entertained and befriended everyone of world importance, from the Kennedys in the 50s and 60s to Prince Charles and Camilla in the new millennium, yet always had some small anecdote about even the humblest servant.
This striking humility, with her gratitude for the good fortune she enjoyed (and quiet stoicism over the losses of three of her seven babies), makes her writing immediate and engaging. Like most of her famous sisters, she had a natural talent for writing and storytelling and was a true eccentric, at strokes fascinating, moving and hilarious.
Not the fanciest Mitford sister, the wittiest or the archest, Debo is the most solid and grounded of those published. Her photographs from over the decades, from angelic infancy, to tulle and diamante bedecked debutante, to hostess of twentieth century world leaders, are breathtaking.
Of all Debo's books, this one in particular is the icing on the cake for any Mitford canon devotee. She does not disappoint!
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